All this is a matter of decency, honesty and fairness to yourself, to the other person involved, and to your family and Jewish tradition.It is a pre-condition of authentic and lasting love.
Are his words, “I care only for what’s best for you” grounded?
] Any sort of physical contact or intimacy, as it brings people closer together, tends to bind—a kind of glue as it were—but as glue should be used to bind together only when a permanent bond is decided upon, physical contact should begin only after the marriage itself.
As Jews, we take relationships between people much more seriously than does “society”.
Jewish society cannot tolerate a situation where a young woman, or a young man lets her or himself be used, taken advantage of, or hurt.
Let the woman use her “feminine charm”; it’s her legitimate prerogative, a healthy manifestation of her femininity.
It’s quite one thing to be charmed by it, but don’t be taken in don’t let it blind you; don’t fall for it.
There is no ultimate danger if a girl employs her femininity to charm a young man into turning a fleeting interest into a more serious one.
Young men, however, sometimes deceive a young woman into thinking that they are in love, while all they want is a physical relationship.
And why is such restraint, forbidding even mere “touching” (or negiah in Hebrew), so crucial a factor in the successful observance of those laws that define the Jewish standards of family loyalty and interpersonal relationships?
Jewish law states that once a young woman begins menstruating, she assumes the status of nidah, and remains, from that point on, “off limits”, in regard to physical contact with men, until the day of her marriage.
If you take the romantic love angle too seriously, you will lose your proper place in the marital relationship and, with it, lose your dignity and your role as master of your destiny.