But most of us are shaped by our family and upbringing. Some make conscience decisions to be different -- whether or not they're able to is another story.
Having a basic overview of your mate's family background can give you a window to interpret who he is.
My boyfriend "Bill" and I are at a crossroads and I need advice. I am in my early 30s and have had a few LTRs and lived with one boyfriend for a couple of years.
I told him I've waited six months to hear those words and he couldn't even man up and say them.
He got mad and told me he couldn't say it until he was ready.
While there are no clear-cut rules for dating, there are plenty of guidelines that can help you find what you're looking for and avoid pitfalls.
The single most important thing you should know when looking for your ideal partner is not about your partner; it's about you. If you can answer it, then you can move on to things you want in a partner and things you'd like to avoid.
Some people simply do not move beyond the emotional injuries of old relationships and remain stuck on them indefinitely.
It's not necessarily a bad thing to learn about your mate's past relationships; it may help you understand her.Just as you are well served by knowing what you want from your life, you should understand the basics of what your mate wants from his life.One way to do this is to simply ask, "What do you imagine your life like in a year, two years, five years or ten? But if they happen to be, you're both probably better served to learn it after four months instead of four years.This isn't even about love: it's about committing to a future and to the next phase of your relationship. If you really believe in a potential future with him, sit him down and explain that you want to see this relationship continue to deepen and grow. Have you listened to him at any point during these six months?Six months is a reasonable time to hang out, go on dates, get to know each other and determine whether you care about someone enough to go on to the next step. Could Bill have spelled it out any clearer for you? Why do you have to attach timetables to a relationship?If he doesn't want to move in together after a year, it's totally over. Bill has been completely honest about how fast he's willing to move, yet you keep pushing him.